These Are a Few of My Favorite (Cheap) Things

Last week, while I was drinking delicious beer with some lovely fellow bloggers acting all adult-like at the BlogHer conference in Chicago, I received a lovely email from someone who has asked to remain anonymous.

“Dear Metalia,” she wrote, “I like when you review products and makeup, but can you do some reviews of some cheaper things?”

After checking with J to see if he’d created a new email address and sent this message to me in an attempt to curb my raging Sephora habit (It’s ACROSS THE STREET from my office. I’m not made of stone, you know!), I looked back through my makeup reviews, and realized that the emailer was correct. I have been primarily reviewing Sephora purchases lately, likely due to its proximity. (Rite Aid is, like, three whole blocks away, people.)

First of all, emailer, thank you so much for essentially giving me a post topic. Secondly, her point is well-taken, because the stuff I’ve been reviewing lately is not representative of the contents of my makeup bag as a whole. For you see, I’m an equal opportunity makeup/product whore. I don’t care how much it costs, or who makes it; if I like it, I buy it. So I say it’s time for reviews of some of my favorite cheaper products.

Now, before I begin…at BlogHer last week, I attended a session where some women raised the subject of blogging about product reviews, and getting paid for them. I perceived the general sentiment as equating this activity with devil worship. Or something. I don’t know. At the time, I was all, “Whuh? Who cares one way or the other? Now how did I get this gum on the ass of my pants? And where can I get more free stuff?”

True (and fascinating) story.

My point here is that nobody is paying me to review anything. Ordinarily, I’d never have even thought to announce that, but the aforementioned discussion at the session somehow compels me to mention it. (And also let you know that the gum was successfully removed from my pants, and I did, in fact, obtain more free stuff. )

On with the show! In no particular order, here are my very favorite beauty products under $10 (all prices are estimated):

Sephora Professionel Most Complete Lip Balm -$2

I’ve shared my love of this balm with a few of my fellow lipgloss hos. This is the most fantastic lip balm ever. So great, in fact, that I have foregone my customary “no pots” policy for it. It’s heavy-duty, but not too thick, and is slightly tingly with a subtle vanilla flavor. Love this.

Johnson & Johnson Soothing Naturals Soothe and Protect Balm Stick -$5

You know, if you were to ask me “Metalia, what surprised you most about having a baby?” I would answer you thusly: “The amount of stuff you can steal from them.”

Oh, don’t call Child Services; I’ll explain.

Upon having a child, I wasn’t surprised by my love for the little guy, or the amount of time and energy one expends by caring for a baby; I kind of expected all of that. What did take me by surprise, however, was the fact that there are AWESOME products out there, ostensibly intended for my son, but that I have since co-opted for my own use.

My favorite of these items, by far, is this multi-purpose stick. It soothes lips, gives a pretty sheen to cheeks, kicks the proverbial ass of dry patches, and smells purty. And the package is so cute; it’s like a tiny little deodorant!

OH.

Speaking of which?

You know what I DON’T love? This new deodorant that I recently tried. The logo of said deodorant is commonly known as the bird of peace, but I experienced no such peace upon trying this product, so instead, I shall call it Pigeon. Because we all know how much I love those birds. Anyway, I applied the Pigeon deodorant, in a scent called Smooth Cashmere. (Which, by the way? Befuddles me to no end. Unless it was left out in the rain and hidden in the back of a dank closet for three months, how would cashmere have a scent?) On the subway a mere hour later, I had the following internal monologue:

“Ooh, Arcade Fire! Rock on, iPod. What am I going to get for breakfast? Clearly a bagel of some sort, but what--HOLY HELL! What is that stench? Did a stinky dude get on at the last station? [Looks around; sniffs.] Oh, Lord. It’s me. I'm the smelly person on the train. I AM THE SMELLY PERSON ON THE TRAIN! Whatever will become of me?!”

It seems that the Smooth Cashmere scent of Pigeon-brand deodorant had somehow downgraded to Hobo Crotch.

Might I add that I generally do not stink? And that this deodorant not only failed to complete its intended role, but actively made me reek?

Suck it, Pigeon deodorant.

Where was I?

Oh, yes. Stuff I actually like:

Skin Milk Facial Moisturizer $6

It’s in a tiny milk bottle! It’s a wonderful moisturizer! It smells divine! What more do you need to know?

E.l.f. All Over Color Stick $1

This stuff is awesome. I have it in the Persimmon shade, and generally use it as either an eyeshadow or blush. Go online, find the color that’s right for you, and buy it. IT’S A DOLLAR, PEOPLE.

Neutrogena MoistureShine Lip Soother - $7

C'mon, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention my favorite lip gloss under $10, right?

I have this in a shade called “Glaze,” which I’ve recommended to a number of friends, and it appears (so far, at least) to be universally flattering. It’s very sheer, and shiny without being sticky. Oh, and it has SPF 20. Pretty and sun-smart. :)

So, people.

What are your favorite beauty bargains? I NEED TO KNOW.

And don't you love how I pose important (to me) questions like this in the middle of the weekend, when the internets are, for all intents and purposes, dead? My timing, it is impeccable.