Nine points of, like, VITAL importance.

Can’t! Form! Cohesive thoughts! Time for a bulleted post:

• It’s our anniversary on Sunday! We will have been married five years, which, hi. WHERE DOES THE TIME GO? But first! Do you know where I’m going before J & Metalia’s Fun-Filled Anniversary Night on the Town? For Mother’s Day (TWO MOTHER’S DAYS AGO, MIND YOU), J got me a gift certificate to a fancypants spa. Massage, facial, mani/pedi…in short, a (half) day of heaven. Somehow, 1.5 years have whooshed by, and hi, the gift certificate expires next month. Since my parents are already taking the kids for the day on Sunday, I shall be spending the morning getting buffed, polished, and having the tension rubbed out of my back by a woman I imagine will be aggressively burly, and potentially named Svetlana.

• After this, I will be spending my anniversary afternoon and evening with (duh) my husband. To celebrate our five (FIVE! OH MY GOD, FIVE!) years of marriage, we’ll be seeing this play (which, if I watched 90210: The New Class of the College Years 2.0 Electric Boogaloo, I would tell you that said play figures prominently in certain episodes of the show. But I totally don’t watch that show, so, whatever), going out to dinner, and staying at this hotel.

As you can imagine, I have very high hopes for Sunday being a Cavalcade of Awesome.

• I cannot get the following songs out of my head: Ray Lamontagne’s “Burn in My Skin,” Bon Iver’s Skinny Love,”…and Rihanna’s “Disturbia.” There is something deeply wrong with this picture. Or at least the last song on the list.

• Yay, McKey! Boo, Tyra’s sense of fashion, most notably the crazy-cyborg-alien-commander-slash-Melanie-Griffith-in-Working-Girl-hybrid dress worn in the last scene!

• There's going to be an ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT MOVIE? Did I hear that right?

• Speaking of which, what would it say about me if I told you that my tickets for Twilight have already been preordered? Hypothetically speaking, of course.

• Today, I was pondering just how awesomely awesome it would be to have a bikini waxer who made house calls. And then I realized Bikini Wax House Calls could very easily be the name of a late-night Cinemax movie that is already in existence. And if it's not, well really, someone should get on that.

• I wrote a post for BeautyHacks earlier this week, discussing my patented five minute morning hair and makeup routine. Why does this deserve its own bullet? BECAUSE IT INCLUDES VIDEO, PEOPLE. VIDEO OF ME, APPLYING MAKEUP AND DOING MY HAIR. (In under five minutes of course.) So, if you’d like to learn about a fast morning makeup routine, and/or see what I look like, on video (first thing in the morning, no less), then really, this is the post for you.

• I’ve been searching high and low for The Perfect Dress for my little brother’s engagement party in January. I haven’t found it yet, but I know you people are very good at helping me with, well, anything I’ve thrown at you to date, so: I’m trying to find a fancy-ish, knee-length dress. My only requirement is that it must have sleeves of some sort (even if they’re cap sleeves), and that it not be black (I have too many such dresses already). Any suggestions?