How to Make Your Own Lady Gaga Costume in 10 Simple Steps (Obviously, one of those steps involves rap and a turtle snuggie)

Today marked the Jewish holiday of Purim (and if you'd like to learn more about it, feel free to check out my interview here), a celebration with food, parties, and costumes. One of my favorite things about the holiday is getting to choose my kids' costumes (that is, before they're old enough to articulate that they want to be a superhero or princess, or whatever). I like to do something a little different in those precious few years I have before Spiderman and Cinderella become de rigeur. T is already past the point of going along with my insane plans for him (whatever, one day he'll realize that Alex DeLarge would have been AN AWESOME COSTUME), and was dead-set on being DJ Lance from Yo Gabba Gabba this year. I must admit that he rocked it:

Lo, however, was a different story. I knew a few months ago that she would make a perfect Lady Gaga (chief among my reasons: she cannot yet say "OH HAILLLLLL NO, MOM."). It was the perfect costume project, and I set out to pull one together for her myself. The steps that follow would work for any grownup or kid intent on Gagafying themselves:

STEP 1: FIND A JUMPING-OFF POINT/FOCAL POINT FOR YOUR COSTUME. I (sigh) BEGRUDGINGLY SUGGEST AMERICAN APPAREL.

In my case, it was these leggings from That Store (and if you know me BUT AT ALL, you know that me crediting them for anything positive is a miracle):

I took one look at these bad boys, and when I realized I was completely agape, I knew I had both a winner in the Baby Gaga-esque leggings department, AND inspiration for a color scheme.

STEP 2: FIND RIDICULOUS SHOES TO MATCH:

Done and done.

STEP 3: FIND A PLAIN BLACK ONESIE/ CHEAP LEOTARD. BID IT -- AS YOU KNOW IT -- A FOND ADIEU:

STEP 4: BUY/FIND THE TACKIEST, UGLIEST, MOST VISUALLY OFFENSIVE DRESS YOU CAN, ON THE CHEAP. ONCE AGAIN, BID IT A FOND ADIEU.  

My strategy here involved going to a store that sells off-price European  kids clothes (which are generally more out-there than American stuff), and digging right in to the "clearance-clearance-PLEASE TAKE THIS STUFF MY GOD WE WILL PAY YOU" rack. This is how I found a dress -- that was what appeared to be the sartorial bastard child of a mid-'80s Katarina Witt skating costume and something that Minnie Mouse would wear to a funeral -- reduced from $89 to $4.99:

STEP 5: DECONSTRUCT DRESS. 

I cut free-form shapes from the outer layer, and sewed them all over the onesie:

I then  inspected the lining of the dress, and realized....

...that it would make perfect Gaga-esque epaulet...type...things. Like so:

STEP 6: GET A LITTLE PUNCHY, WORK ON ORIGINAL THEMED RAP. OBVIOUSLY, THE NINJA TURTLE SNUGGIE IS INVOLVED.

(Hey, I'm just telling you my process, here.)

STEP 7: ADMIRE "HANDIWORK."

STEP 8: HAIR! RELATED: PURCHASE SOMETHING VERRRRRY IMPORTANT.

I scoured the internet for the perfect Gaga hair bow to complete the look, and found one in this Etsy shop. (I heartily endorse her and her work, which not only looked great, but withstood the clutches of a grabby toddler. I did not mention my blog to her, so I'm gaining nothing by telling you this.)

After affixing the hair bow, I wove an extra piece of scrap tulle from the dress lining onto a bobby pin, and clipped that into her hair, sticking straight up. Because, you know, why not.

STEP 9: MAKEUP!

Seeing as I was dealing with a toddler, I quickly realized that dark eyeshadow/liner, while true to the overall look, kind of made her look like...a wee 'tute. Not cool. I quickly backed up off that, and focused instead on myriad forms of crazypants glitter/sparkles, and red, red lips.

Obviously, she was pleased.

 

Eh, whatever, she got over it.

STEP 10: UNLEASH BABY GAGA ON THE WORRRRRLD!