You guys, you should know one thing about me, which is that I have always loved dressing up, and look for any excuse to do so. Alas, there are really very few opportunities for me to do so on a day-to-day basis. (Which: WHY NOT, LIFE?) And so, when Torrie essentially gave me the excuse, I told her that it. was. on.
The thing is, I feel like everything that could be snarked on about the dresses and the show in general has already been snarked on by this point, so instead, I decided to do a pop quiz of Oscar fashions.
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Before we get to that, allow me to share with you a related IM conversation J and I had today:
Me: Do you have, like, a fake Oscar lying around your office? I need it for...something.
J: No, and--oh god, what are you up to? Are you doing another rap sequence that I have to photograph?
Me: No! This is totally different. It's Oscars impressions.
J: Right, so exactly the same then.
Me: Well, this is worse, because it involves costume changes. I just want to manage your expectations up front.
Me: Now that that's settled, are you opposed to me wasting stale challah rolls? I need them for a few of my impressions. I know we hate wasting food, but no one's eating them now. We should basically grind 'em up for tuppence a bag at this point. HAAHAAAA. Wait. I hate Mary Poppins.
J: ...I just want you to read that back to yourself. I'll take the pictures, but seriously.
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ANYway, here we are now. Identify who I am from the cavalcade of worst-dressed Academy Awards-bound celebrities in the following five shots!