A Brief List of Bedtime-Delaying Excuses Recently Utilized By My Son, Bedtime Delaying Master.
I'm thirsty.
This cup isn't a good cup.
What time can I get up?
I need you to tuck me in.
Tuck me in like a caterpillar.
Why are my ears so wiggly?
My teeth aren't sleepy yet.
I have to peeeee!
I guess I didn't have to pee.
I don't think it's dark yet.
Can I play with my bubble gun in the morning?
I wasn't making noise, I was being a lying-down robot.
Why do pirates have to go on treasure hunts?
I love you, Mommy! Can you come back and give me 100 kisses?
* * * * *
Okay, hit me, you all. What are your kid's/kids' most creative excuses (and can they top "my teeth aren't sleepy yet")?
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30 comments:
My 3 year-old says, "I can't sleep because my body's not working!" Hard to argue with that one. I come back with the Tim Gunn, "Make it work!" Only, you know, more tired and bitchy than Tim ever sounds.
My daughter offers to give me a back rub and she is old enough to give GOOD BACKRUBS. And me? I kinda can't resist a backrub, so she totally takes advantage of that EVERY NIGHT.
But do I care? No. BACKRUB.
I love it! Lying down robot...so funny. My daughter is only 1 so I haven't had to deal with the excuses yet. Soon enough I'm sure.
The moon is watching me.
Ben's not sleeping yet.
I'm too awake!
But when I close my eyes, I can only see blackness!
"Just one more song mom? You sing so pretty."
"I need to get some work done. I need to read my business." (That's a brand new one which I kinda love because it's so hilarious)
"Oh Mom! I gonna miss you!" (When I go to walk out of his room. Stabs me in the heart)
"I NEED MY OTHER SLEEPY TIME SHIRT! NOT THIS SHIRT!"
"My butt itches."
"I want . . . I want . . . something else."
My friend's little boy used to pull out, "It's too dark! I can't see my eyes!"
You're not supposed to kid, you're not supposed to.
I have one more thing to tell you
I need to go potty
I need a cold blanket (I think he's kind of missing the concept of a blanket keeping one warm)
It's not dark yet
Sleep takes too long
My body is telling me it isn't tired
I need more cuddles
I get all of these...every night. It starts with me saying good night in s sweet voice and always ends with a harsh 'go to bed!'. Ugh.
"My sheets are crunchy."
"I can't stop my mind from thinking."
"Why do you get to be up but I don't get to be up? I want to be up."
Man, I wish I was four so someone would make ME go to sleep early. They don't know how good they have it!
My oldest always said, "If I was sleepy wouldn't my body just go to sleep?"
My middle one said- " I am sure there are spiders in the house and I can't sleep because they could come in my room"
My youngest says- " Please mom, 1 more level of killing nazi zombies and then I will go to bed ok?"
I totally used to pull the "But it's not dark yet!" card with my mom. Summer bedtimes are brutal.
I also once called my mom into my room because there were "too many stuffed animals everywhere."
Two recent Evan classics:
"Mom! Come in here! I'm scared an asteroid is going to hit the earth!"
...and...
"Mommy! I need you to come in here so we can look out the window and I can show you the most specialest star that leads us to Jesus!"
Honestly, I'm not sure where he comes up with this stuff.
I've gotten (from my son):
"my sheets don't like me"
"my eyelashes hurt when I close my eyes"
and
"Sleep isn't my friend anymore. Only the tv is."
Sorry, can't add to all these adorable excuses (YET)! My daughter is only 18 months old and she LOVES bed time. I tell her it's time for sleep and she leaps up, bounds down the hall for her room, opens her pajama drawer and taps her little finger on her cheek while she goes, "Hmmm..." and decides on which pajamas to wear.
I won the lottery with that kid.
"there's a bad kitty in my bed, he scratched me!" (then cue me, miming picking up the 'kitty' and putting him in time out. OY.)
Hoot! Hoot! - I'm a Hadrosaur and Hadrosaurs don't sleep
(hanging on to my arm) I want to keep you, Mama
(holding index finger aloft) BOOGER!
(crying pitifully and clutching one of the 27 books in his bed) I want to read these books, Mama, but I don't know the words
And, my favorite, actually from my nephew:
(pointing to the alphabet quilt above his bed) I can't sleep, Mama! I'm afraid of the Q - it has a scary tail!
I don't know HOW to fall asleep!!
But I want it to be morning right noW!
My niece Angelina once told me, "I too tired to sleep, Auntie!"
Ours just pits my husband and I against each other.
If I'm putting him to bed, it's "Mommy, go get the baby from Daddy and let him put me to bed."
He'll alternate parents all the livelong day if we let him.
Last night my 5 yo came out of bed holding one of his stuffed animals. Apparently, the stuffed doggie poked my guy in the eye "on purpose" and needed a time out.
Hahahahaha! Clearly your child, what with the creativity. I mean, what's a lying-down robot? What's the point of one of those?
Oh, that last one would kill me. I'd probably just invite him on the couch to cuddle for the rest of the night. I also love @Samantha's "Oh Mom, I'm gonna miss you." Kids! I need them!
I blogged about this not too long ago. My 5 year-old daughter's top 3 bedtime stall tactics:
"I just snuck out of bed to look at you. You're so pretty."
"Mom, can I stay up and watch a movie? I love you so much, you're my heart. My heart is even shaped like you and has brown hair."
"Mommy, I can count PAST 100! Listen! 1, 2, 3..."
Oh god, love it! I love the lying-down one, HILARIOUS!
My son's most recent Putting-Off-Bedtime-Endeavors are:
"Mommy? I love you 1,000 times!"
"Mommy! This is so strange. If I don't eat a snack now, I won't be hungry for breakfast in the morning."
Kids are so funny!
Yeah! I love kids, they are so funny and sweet.
4 years old here.
Love it. 110% of it.
The MEANINGLESS conversations ... AT NIGHT.
Glad to have found you:)
Looks like we'll get along great! lol
Mine says he wants one more "twinkle". (We sing 2 different versions of Twinkle, Twinkle little star).
"I want the special twinkle". Once he gets that, he asks for the "regular". And the dance begins....
My 4 year (at the time) said she couldn't sleep because she forgot how her blankets worked and she was cold.
Ooooh - you made me laugh and tear up. I could never ever resist the 'come back and give me 100 kisses' request.
Here's mine:
"But daddy's a big boy and HE doesn't sleep alone!"
http://justb-byou.com/quotes/quote/35/
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